Landon is trying so hard to crawl! He is so adorable to watch as he rolls himself over to his tummy, pushes his arms straight while he lifts his chest, gets up on his knees, and then rocks on all fours. He rocks so hard...almost like he's "revving" himself up, ready to take off at any time. Once in a while he takes things one step further and launches himself forward face first...hilarious :) I'm sure he'll be crawling in a week...and I'm completely unprepared. Nothing in our house is childproof...and I mean NOTHING! We have so much to do: gates at the top and bottom of stairs, outlets to plug, brick fireplace to cushion...*SIGH* so much more.
I was not prepared for how quickly he would be growing up. People told me this more often than I ever wanted to hear it, but I think it was impossible to understand until I experienced it. 6 months already. 6 MONTHS!! He has changed SO much in those 6 months, as have I. I have always known that I wanted to be a mother, and I was thrilled when I found out I was pregnant...but nothing prepared me for how much my heart would grow and change once he arrived. I have a hard time even remembering or imagining life before him, and I absolutely hate being away from him.
I love my job, but I struggle with the guilt I feel from leaving him home while I spend my time with other people's children. Thankfully we are blessed with incredible family members who are able to help watch him, so I have the reassurance of knowing that he's with people who love and adore him...but it does nothing but cause me to feel envious on top of guilty. After a long day at work, I'm absolutely exhausted, but I can't wait to get home and love on him. I thank God every day for allowing me to be a mom, and I just pray that I can be the kind of mom Landon is proud to have. Just looking at him makes me realize how blessed I truly am.
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